英语厉害的进来帮忙批改下作文,本人明年考研,英语作文不好,刚写的作文,求批改,求提错误,求建议.

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英语厉害的进来帮忙批改下作文,本人明年考研,英语作文不好,刚写的作文,求批改,求提错误,求建议.

错误肯定很多,求改正.

On Internet security

Today,leisure time of individual is increasingly populated by Internet. People trend to shopping online.But the problems that Internet bring to us are severe. Internet security is a top one.

Recent years, a growing number of folks who without security in mind are deceived on Internet.They lost heavily in the incidents. It is quite difficult to recover lost property,reagrdlss of how grieved they are. People exposing privacy on the Internet is trend to targeted by criminals. Protecting the Internet security is on the ropes.

Hence,it is imperative for us to take drastic measures to defend our Internet security. We should appeal to the authorities to make strict laws to control network crime.For another,We should protect our privacy on the Internet and don’t trust anyone casually.We will have a brilliant future if we work together.

优质解答：

leisure time of individual >>> individuals' lesiure time 复数individuals,指很多的 ‘个人’

populated by internet >> spent on the internet.populated 是指人口稠密

trend >>tend trend是趋势,tend才是趋向于

to shopping >> to go shopping

bring to us are severe >> bring us are serious

is a top one >> is of utmost importance.

recent years >> in recent years

without security >> with little safety consciousness

are deceived >> were deceived

It is quite.they are >>> It was quite...they were都已经过去了,用past tense吧

trend to targeted by criminals >> tend to be targeted by potential scammers 注意语法,被动态时是to be,说成criminals（罪犯）太严重了

is on the ropes >>> is a must on the ropes 是指岌岌可危,在绳上要跌下来了

to defend our internet security>>> to improve our internet security

to make strict laws>>> to enforce stricter laws

for another>>> futhermore

anyone casually >> anyone readily

纯属个人意见!仅供参考!:D

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